Arts and Humanities Commons^™

Breaking Me Down And Lifting Me Up: An Autoethnography Of Being A Black Autistic Woman Online, Morgan Harper-Nichols

Ought: The Journal of Autistic Culture

This autoethnography investigates the diverse challenges associated with being a Black, undiagnosed autistic woman coming of age on the internet, and examines how online experiences shaped my identity over the past twenty years. Early encounters with racism and cautious self-expression on platforms such as forums, GeoCities, Myspace, and YouTube are explored as my initial efforts to "fit in" in virtual spaces. I discuss how engaging with platforms like Instagram and Etsy enabled my participation in the gig economy while grappling with my pre-diagnosis social struggles. I also share how I navigate post-2020 experiences as a Black autistic online creator, how …

Multiracial Identity: Membership And Cultural Representation, Bethanne Grover

MSU Graduate Theses

What follows are two methods woven together to investigate multiracial identity and membership. The first section investigates the role of ethnographic research as the methodological tool of choice for a multiracial who positions herself along the liminal perspective through experimental autoethnographic tales of ambiguous embodiment. The tales weave in and out of the text and work to articulate multiracial identity through a critical race standpoint rooted in amorphousness. The second section applies a traditional qualitative approach, including narrative interviews of multiracial participants – focusing on intercultural communication. Identity negotiation theory and communication accommodation theory guide my investigation into intergroup communication/coping …

“We Didn’T Have A Lot Of Money, We Worked Hard, And We Ate Beans”: Examining The Narrative Inheritance From An Appalachian Father To His Son, Thomas Townsend

Electronic Theses and Dissertations

The author contends that narratives, shaped not only by events but also by socioeconomic and geographic factors, are narratives that require exploration and analysis because these narratives build the lives in which individuals exist. By understanding narratives passed down with which they have built their lives, individuals can come to greater understanding of the narratives in which they live. To understand the narratives, he created and continues to craft about his life, the author needed to understand his narrative inheritance. When a proposed thesis study imploded, the focus of the study shifted to exploring the circumstances of a single interview …

“Surveilling The Maternal Body”: A Critical Examination Through Foucault’S Panopticon, Sarah Symonds Leblanc

The Qualitative Report

This article analyzes my personal experience of having a maternal body through autoethnographic means. Being pregnant is a time of celebration, but moms experience private and public changes in their bodies. These public changes continue during the postpartum period. Ground in Foucault’s panopticon, this paper explores how the maternal body undergoes self-surveillance as well as surveillance by the proverbial others. I provide vignettes and personal experiences to highlight the panopticon: moms self-surveil but moms are also being surveilled when in the public eye. I make the argument of how the maternal body is a site of surveillance often used to …

The (In)Visible Woman: A Performative Autoethnographic Exploration Of Queer Femme-Ininity And Queer Isolation, Bri Ozalas

Masters Theses, 2020-current

This thesis is a performative autoethnographic exploration of my experiences existing betwixt-and-between the intersection of queer femme-ininity and isolation. Through a creative, affective rendition of my experiences, I detail and connect the nuances of queerness, femme-ininity, and queer isolation to provide a closer look at understanding queer identity with an absence of connection to the queer community. First, I provide an overview of the main theoretical and methodological approaches, and main concepts I utilize throughout my project. I then provide the intricacies of queer theory, queer intersectionality, and affect theory to provide theoretical explanations of my approach to queer isolation. …

When The Beat Drops: Exploring Hip Hop, Home And Black Masculinity, Marquese Lamont Mcferguson

USF Tampa Graduate Theses and Dissertations

In this autoethnographic dissertation, I take readers on a narrative journey to three of my storied homeplaces and explore my lived experiences within each site. In the process of exploring my homeplaces, I analyze how I perform my black masculine self within the context of each location, how my cultural body supports and challenges hegemonic black masculinity, and how each location constrains and frees up my performance of self. With this dissertation, I will contribute to the field of communication studies by extending the method and writing practice of autoethnography, the theorization of the black masculine, and the exploration of …

Elemental Climate Disaster Texts And Queer Ecological Temporality, Laura Mattson

USF Tampa Graduate Theses and Dissertations

This thesis approaches climate disaster texts as an opportunity to challenge constructions of the body, space, and time. Developed from embodied experiential knowledge about hurricanes, my work will explore how climate disasters can teach us to reimagine human-nature relationships. In my two analysis chapters, I use critical textual analysis and autoethnography to challenge particular representations of the human-nature relationship as a binary between nature and culture. By intervening in the nature-culture binary, I theorize queer ecological temporality as an opportunity to reveal and challenge constructions of nature and time. Working at the intersections of queer and ecocritical theory, this thesis …

Journeying Into The Well: An Autoethnography Of 35 Retreats Across Two Decades, E. James Baesler

Communication & Theatre Arts Faculty Publications

In this autoethnography I narrate the story of my retreat experiences and spiritual practices at the Well Retreat Center over a span of two decades. The Well is both a geographical place in the Isle of Wright County in Virginia, and a metaphor for a spiritual journey into the inner Well of our being. I chronicle an amalgam of 35 retreats in one 24-hour retreat, narrating stories about: leaving home and settling in, dreaming and awakening, sunrise and sunset, walking in nature and walking the narrow path, discovering life behind a cracked door, and uncovering the mystery that lies at …

In The Name Of Merit: Racial Violence In The Academy, Reshmi Dutt-Ballerstadt

Faculty Publications

Racial violence in the academy is enacted upon faculty of color, particularly women, in multiple disciplines. This essay attempts to both expose and suggest that everyday systemic racism has become a pervasive and normalizing feature within disciplines that continue to privilege white and Eurocentric forms of knowledge-making while devaluing others. Furthermore, attempts to challenge such supremacies are immediately countered by calls and charges of incivility. This is an essay about the costs of unmasking norms of civility as it bears upon constructions of both whiteness and meritocracy.

Shush: A Creative (Re)Construction, Kathleen Spring

Faculty & Staff Publications

Shush: A Creative (Re)Construction stems from work conducted during a sabbatical in fall 2017. The audio piece, Shush Me Awake, is a composition that explores the shush as a performative act. The accompanying framing essay uses an autoethnographic approach to provide a contextualized look at the composition process for this piece, while simultaneously situating it within existing scholarship in library and information studies on the image of the librarian and stereotypes. The composer notes provide additional technical details about the audio piece itself.

Embodied Autoethnography, Courtney M. Fuller

Master of Liberal Studies Theses

In the past few decades, scholars have begun to combine research and personal experience, exploring the self through autoethnography. This thesis is a reflexive, arts-based autoethnographic study that investigates body, female body image, and identity. Though autoethnography has several subgenres (e.g., critical, performative), this thesis aligns most closely with embodied autoethnography. With this embodied autoethnography, I invite readers—you—inside several pivotal experiences in my life. Combining personal narrative and others’ research, I endeavor to understand changes in body image and identity in some of the most transformative experiences in my life. Specifically, I seek to address: (a) How do life-altering events …

‘Animals Are Their Best Advocates’: Interspecies Relations, Embodied Actions, And Entangled Activism, Gonzalo Villanueva

Animal Studies Journal

Since 1986, the Coalition Against Duck Shooting (CADS) has sought to ban the practice of recreational duck hunting across Australia. Campaigners have developed techniques to disrupt shooters, rescue injured water birds, and gain media coverage. The campaign is underpinned by embodied processes that engage empathy, emotion, affect, and cognition. Seeking to understand human-animal interrelations, I conducted multispecies autoethnographic research, during which I participated as an activist-scholar in the anti-duck shooting campaign for nearly three months. Drawing on feminist philosopher Lori Gruen and others, this article conceptualises ‘entangled activism’ and argues that embodied actions arise from interspecies interrelations. This article demonstrates …

Skooz Be Hat’In: My Story Navigating And Negotiating Standard American English, Lisa M. Westbrooks

Pedagogy and Theatre of the Oppressed Journal

In most education systems, African American Vernacular English is not considered a language or variety of English and students who speak it are coerced into using Standard American English only. Using autoethnographic methodology I examine my personal language navigation and negotiation of Standard American English and the oppression of language and identity that accompanied it. I use storytelling to draw the reader into my childhood memories and the drifting away of my first language. As a young student and English as a Second Language teacher I have learned from these experiences and share strategies so that others may successfully reduce …

(In)Visibility And Meaning In Food Labor: A Feminist Autoethnography, Kathryn Shedden

Masters Theses, 2010-2019

My graduate thesis project entitled “(In)visibility and Meaning in Food Labor: A Feminist Autoethnography” illuminates the gendered experiences of female food laborers and how women make meaning through their labor in this context. Gendered experiences do not stand apart from classed and raced identities, which I also reflexively analyze throughout this thesis. Women working within the food chain have been historically marginalized and made invisible, though they make up an increasingly significant portion of this workforce, a trend known as the “feminization of agriculture.” The discussion of the work that women do when discussing food in the academic literature also …

Microaggressions Within The Lgbtq+ Community: An Autoethnography, Erika A. Perez Montes

Capstone Projects and Master's Theses

This autoethnography is about different points in my life where I committed microaggressions towards the LGBTQ+ community specific to different genders, sexual orientations and/or how people in the community present themselves. I use “thick intersectionality” ‒ an embodied exploration of the complex particularities of individuals’ lives and identities associated with their race, class, gender, sexuality, and national locations ‒ as a means of portraying my message, voicing the emotions that I felt, and the identity I occupied at that moment. I show that the intersectionalities of queer folks’ identities create unconscious microaggressions towards other queer folks. The purpose of my …

Shapeshifting And Sexuality: A Critical Autoethnography Of A Selkie, Sophie Jones

Electronic Theses and Dissertations

Shapeshifting lore has provided a rich and evocative way to explore human experiences across many different cultures. This author utilizes the mythology of selkies to unpack the perspective of a white queer woman who is dealing with issues of racial privilege, heteronormativity, and patriarchal oppression. Utilizing performative writing and autoethnographic method, the author creates an argument for the integration of intersectional practices within the work of queer theorists, as well as for resistance against assimilation.

Searching For The Divine: An Autoethnographic Account Of Religious/Spiritual And Academic Influences On The Journey To Professor, E. James Baesler

Communication & Theatre Arts Faculty Publications

This autoethnographic account chronicles my academic and religious/spiritual path to becoming a professor of Communication. Spiritual influences and significant life events related to prayer, education, teaching, and research serve as sign posts marking the way. The journey begins with a child scientist experimenting with life—and an adolescent discovering the joy of reading through an illness. The journey continues with a crisis in undergraduate years followed by indoctrination stories of graduate school. Securing and retaining an academic position in Communication reveals the complexities of negotiating research and teaching in higher education. After tenure and promotion, a concurrent spiritual awakening begins a …

A Tank Full Of Wishful Thinking: Crystallizing The Rhythms Of The Road, Leanna K. Smithberger

Masters Theses, 2010-2019

This thesis is a personal exploration of American car culture — the roads the enable it, the everyday actions that sustain it, and the values that justify it. I use a constellation of mobilities, autoethnography, and rhythmanalysis in order to generate a glimpse into the rhythm of our road-centered culture — how it shapes and constrains our lives in mundane and extraordinary ways, why it is largely taken for granted, and why it is so stubbornly persistent. I use a variety of artistic, evocative methods, including narrative, poetry, and music, because I argue that knowing is not enough — we …

Love On - The Life Of A Suicide Survivor: A Performance Autoethnographic Study, Patricia R. Wheeler

Electronic Theses and Dissertations

Suicide touches the lives of millions of people each year in this country alone, yet conversations about suicide loss and survival after a loss remain taboo and often do not happen. The story I performed for this performance autoethnographic study centers on my life as a survivor of suicide. It provides a starting point for dialog regarding trauma, grief, and suicide loss. The narrative was constructed directly following the sudden death of my father, which had a direct effect on my ability to produce artistic work. The development, staging and performance of the story were altered to account for the …

Of All Days: Critical Pedagogy Outside The Classroom, Lisa M. Tillmann Ph.D.

Faculty Publications

A student at the author’s college pens a racist column on immigration for the school newspaper. Two departments, including the author’s, send campus-wide emails denouncing the rhetoric. A firestorm erupts, as much over the emails as over the op-ed. Years later, the student visits the author unannounced.

Remembering A Cool September, Lisa M. Tillmann Ph.D.

Faculty Publications

This ethnographic short story chronicles the author’s emotional journey following September 11, 2001. After weeks of disconnection, she encounters a display of patriotism by two gay male friends, provoking her to process what it means to be both patriotic and gay in contemporary U.S. culture.

Father's Blessing: Ethnographic Drama, Poetry, And Prose, Lisa M. Tillmann Ph.D.

Faculty Publications

Following interpretivist traditions focusing on how individuals make sense of and make meaning from their lived experience, the author, a heterosexual woman, travels with a gay male friend/participant to visit his estranged father, a retired Air Force pilot and elder in the Mormon Church. The work attempts to show the dialogic construction, negotiation, and transformation of identities and relationships.

Passings, Lisa M. Tillmann Ph.D.

Faculty Publications

The author, a heterosexual woman, and Gordon Bernstein, a gay man, have been friends and research collaborators since 1995. In 2004, the author accompanied Gordon on a trip to his hometown of Philadelphia to conduct fieldwork and interview family members. This project ethnographically explored personal and relational opportunities and challenges associated with coming out in a family system defined by avoidant communication, hegemonic masculinity, and terminal illness.

Revisiting Don/Ovan, Lisa M. Tillmann Ph.D.

Faculty Publications

In this piece, the author, a heterosexual woman, travels to her hometown of Lake City, MN to reconnect with Donovan Marshall, a gay man she last saw in 1986. "Revisiting Don/ovan" explores opportunities and challenges of coming out, leaving, and returning to live in a small town.

State Of Unions: Politics And Poetics Of Performance, Lisa M. Tillmann Ph.D.

Faculty Publications

At the 2005 International Congress of Qualitative Inquiry, the author delivered a poem and slide show, “The State of Unions: Activism (and In-Activism) in Decision 2004.” The performance processed the election in the context of her research community, a network of gay male friends—marginalized by sexual orientation but privileged by sex, gender expression, race, class, and education. Audience members offered mixed responses, some praising its provocative content, others criticizing the author’s position and tone, which some perceived as hostile, even as “gay bashing.”

Wedding Album: An Antiheterosexist Performance Text, Lisa M. Tillmann Ph.D.

Faculty Publications

Historical and personal snapshots of weddings become poetic stanzas that advocate for marriage equality and for a social safety net strong enough to protect the human rights and meet the human needs of everyone, regardless of relational—or any other—status

The Meaning Of Stories Without Meaning: A Post-Holocaust Experiment, Tori Chambers Lockler

USF Tampa Graduate Theses and Dissertations

Dissonance exists in efforts to communicate about suffering and despair. Showcasing common societal flawed reactions to despair begs for discourse to create a more communicatively healthy response. Attempting to communicate the suffering of others and feeling like I was failing at that goal led to my own suffering. Using writing as a method of personal healing created an intersection of personal narratives of suffering and victim’s narratives (which can arguable only allow for the co-opting of the story and narcissism). Grappling with the limits of writing to heal provided a lens to see the victim’s narratives in such a way …

Don't Ask, Don't Tell: Coming Out In An Alcoholic Family, Lisa M. Tillmann Ph.D.

Faculty Publications

This piece invites readers inside emotional and relational dynamics of coming

out as gay in an alcoholic family system. Taking an interpretive approach to

research, focused on how participants make sense of and make meaning

from their lived experience, “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” offers a longitudinal and

narrative ethnographic account of family secrecy and disclosure.

Growing 'Homeplace' In Critical Service-Learning: An Urban Womanist Pedagogy, Vanessa Lynn Marr

Wayne State University Dissertations

This dissertation explores the role of critical service-learning from the perspective of urban community members. Specifically, it examines the counternarratives produced by Black women community gardeners who engage in academic service-learning with postsecondary faculty. The study focuses on this particular group because of the women's deep involvement with grassroots organizing that reflects their sense of self and other community members, as well as their personal and political relationships to Detroit, Michigan. Given the city's economic disparities rooted in racial segregation, structural violence and gender oppression, Detroit is a site of critical learning within a postindustrial/postcolonial context. This intersectionalist approach to …

Tying It All Together: An Autoethnographic Exploration Of Lgbtq Forensic Competitors, Alyssa Barrie Reid

All Graduate Theses, Dissertations, and Other Capstone Projects

It is a common held belief amongst the intercollegiate forensic community that it breeds a culture of affirmation towards marginalized identities. However, as a competitor I never felt confident portraying my LGBTQ identity while at a forensic tournament. This prompted me to employ interviews of former LGBTQ competitors to explore how they managed their identity. Using grounded theory and autoethnography I uncovered themes related to gender, sex, sexuality, and gender identity performance as they confronted and interacted with forensic competition.